Assignment 1: Creating Characters
9-12 Character - Eragon (Eragon)
Eragon is a popular character because he is a character most can identify with. He is on the cusp of adulthood when a single event changes his life forever. He then embarks on an adventure to battle evil and that fantastical element may appeal to young boys, however his problems are rooted in the real world; those of friendship and dealing with loss are issues that face every child no matter their age or upbringing. This makes Eragon a plausible and likeable character and we accompany him along the way and grow with him.
5-7 Character - Horrid Henry (Horrid Henry)
Horrid Henry is a prankster. Children in this age group really believe, like Henry, they are always right and don’t understand necessarily what they do is wrong. The books focus on Henry's viewpoint so we can understand his motives for doing things. They can sympathise with him as the victim rather than the bully older children know he is. Henry is of school age dealing with problems that most other children encounter, from annoying parents and siblings to girls at school. Children of this age have the same mindset as Henry and follow him hoping his schemes will work.
7-9 Character - Fox (Animals of Farthing Wood)
In a book with an ensemble of characters, Fox is the appointed leader of a band of animals. He is commanding as all leaders could be. He is also selfless and compassionate towards all others no matter what. With no titular character in this book, readers don't picture themselves as the leader but as a follower. As we go through the book the reader realises the sacrifices Fox has to make while helping others as we would help our friends. The reader looks up to Fox, believing in him, willing him to get us to the end safely.
Cosmo (5-7)
Cosmo is an outgoing boy of six that lives with his dad on a Tarakian space station. His mother died in a raid on a Scurge scout ship. Cosmo is left alone most days to roam the ship with his only friend, a sentient robot toy called Bal-4 as there are no other children onboard. Bal-4 was given to him by his dad after arriving on the S.S. Sibilius.
Cosmo is a small boy for his age with a little piggy nose and very blonde hair. He is constantly covered in cut and bruises from crawling through ducts and other small spaces on the ship; this usually ends up with him getting in trouble with his dad. He
also has a bionic eye after losing one boxing with Bal-4. This eye allows him to see infra-red and have x-ray vision. He has learnt much about space travel from workers on the ship and his father allows him to do small jobs for all those on board. Cosmo dreams of one day becoming a space adventurer and is constantly making up scenarios where he must save
the ship from invaders.
Nathan Thames (7-9)
Nathan is ten years old and attends a very prestigious private school in the southwest of England. He is tall for his age with jet black hair and grey eyes. Nathan can be described as slightly rotund and walks with a slight limp, having one leg shorter than the
other. He also wears glasses due to being shortsighted.
A clever and creative child who has problems sustaining this over prolonged periods resulting in him lagging behind his friends, this doesn't bother him though. Nathan enjoys his sport though wouldn't be called sporty. Due to his size he has excelled in the scrum of the school rugby team. At home he spends his time playing his dad's old SNES, he loves retro games.
He really lacks in self-confidence around strangers but is really close with his friends. His best friend is Snotty Fred who he has known since they were five; they also share the same birthday. In their spare time Nathan and his friends, Fred and twins
Ruben and Holly, spend their time making up adventures, obstacle courses using everyday items from the class room and talking video games. They are considered geeky outcasts by their class mates.
Ryan Phelps (9-12)
Ryan has just moved to Surcliffe in Dorset with his mother, who wanted Ryan to have a better life. Over the past year he has got into frequent fights with others at his school. He has no brothers or sisters and his dad left when he was just a baby. As a result he finds it hard to make friends and is content to be the silent one at the back of the class who gets on with his work.
He is very intelligent; he just doesn’t know where he wants to go in life. Ryan is mature and very independent, helping his mum around the house as much as he can. He is just starting his A-Levels in biology, history and media studies. Ryan has very curly brown hair and brown eyes and walks with his shoulders hunched in an attempt to be left alone; this also disguises his
surprising upper-body strength. Bullied at primary school, Ryan despises people who pick on others and has developed a short temper because of this. On his first day his new school he finds an unlikely friend in James, a Year 11 outcast.
Dialogue
"Peas... Again!" sighed Tom disgusted as he sat down at the lunch, "I hate peas. Sarah can I put them on your plate?"
"No you may not!" Sarah replied, rolling her eyes as she scooted onto the bench behind him, "my mum always says you must eat your greens."
Tom gathered up a spoonful of peas. "Your mum never told me nothing, here have some more," said Tom, tipping the peas over Sarah's plate.
"Tom! Stop it! Take them off, take them OFF!" squealed Sarah as she jumped up to aviod the overflowing peas on the table. Tom put a few peas on the palm of his hand and flicked them in Sarah's face, "Eat your greens Sarah. Eat your greens... they're good for you," mocked Tom, flicking more peas at her. Sarah burst into tears.
"Miss Evans! Tom's flicking his peas at me again!" sobbed Sarah.
Feedback:
Popular Children's Characters
You have summed up the characters well and hilighted the reasons children would relate to them. Don't forget to credit the authors with their work.
Your Own Characters
Cosmo - An appealing character who would suit the age group, although it will be a challenge writing sc-fi for children so young.
Nathan - A strong character
Ryan - If he's starting his A-levels he's too old. Children refer to read about others a little older than themselves, so he should be twelve, thirteen at the most. Make sure he has some flaws or weaknesses which make him more human, more interesting and provide characteristics which will determine how he reacts to the challenges he faces in the
story.
All characters have to be a little larger than life. They must have passions, fears and courage, Give them memorable features and
mannerisms and let them make an impact so the reader remembers them. Fix them in the mind by creating an anchor - a name, habit, way of speaking, a sensory perception.
Dialogue
A very god peice of natural dialogue with plenty of conflict, but it's not clear who the viewpoint character is as you have no thoughts. It's best to stick with one point of view (even 3rd person) and tell the story through the main character's eyes, at least in books for younger children. For older readers you can have more than one viewpoint character (third person multiple) but would still be 'inside' the head of that character and would only change between chapters.
You have woven plenty of action into the dialogue too, so that the reader has a mental image of what is happening and where. This helps break up the dialogue, anchors the speech in the scene and contributes to characterisation. It's not necessary to attribute all speech as long as it's clear who is speaking. Most attributive verbs are, and should be, invisible. They should not take the eye away from the speech. If you need to use one, said is usually the best. It is not noticed. The only time an attributive verb really pulls its weight when the meaning of the spoken words in't clear from speech, necessating, for example, 'she lied'.
Fictiona dialogue must have a point an a destination. It can never be general or polite conversation (or arguments). Dialogue is real life conversation without its sidetracks. It has two main functions: to move the story along and reveal character, which yours does very well.
Eragon is a popular character because he is a character most can identify with. He is on the cusp of adulthood when a single event changes his life forever. He then embarks on an adventure to battle evil and that fantastical element may appeal to young boys, however his problems are rooted in the real world; those of friendship and dealing with loss are issues that face every child no matter their age or upbringing. This makes Eragon a plausible and likeable character and we accompany him along the way and grow with him.
5-7 Character - Horrid Henry (Horrid Henry)
Horrid Henry is a prankster. Children in this age group really believe, like Henry, they are always right and don’t understand necessarily what they do is wrong. The books focus on Henry's viewpoint so we can understand his motives for doing things. They can sympathise with him as the victim rather than the bully older children know he is. Henry is of school age dealing with problems that most other children encounter, from annoying parents and siblings to girls at school. Children of this age have the same mindset as Henry and follow him hoping his schemes will work.
7-9 Character - Fox (Animals of Farthing Wood)
In a book with an ensemble of characters, Fox is the appointed leader of a band of animals. He is commanding as all leaders could be. He is also selfless and compassionate towards all others no matter what. With no titular character in this book, readers don't picture themselves as the leader but as a follower. As we go through the book the reader realises the sacrifices Fox has to make while helping others as we would help our friends. The reader looks up to Fox, believing in him, willing him to get us to the end safely.
Cosmo (5-7)
Cosmo is an outgoing boy of six that lives with his dad on a Tarakian space station. His mother died in a raid on a Scurge scout ship. Cosmo is left alone most days to roam the ship with his only friend, a sentient robot toy called Bal-4 as there are no other children onboard. Bal-4 was given to him by his dad after arriving on the S.S. Sibilius.
Cosmo is a small boy for his age with a little piggy nose and very blonde hair. He is constantly covered in cut and bruises from crawling through ducts and other small spaces on the ship; this usually ends up with him getting in trouble with his dad. He
also has a bionic eye after losing one boxing with Bal-4. This eye allows him to see infra-red and have x-ray vision. He has learnt much about space travel from workers on the ship and his father allows him to do small jobs for all those on board. Cosmo dreams of one day becoming a space adventurer and is constantly making up scenarios where he must save
the ship from invaders.
Nathan Thames (7-9)
Nathan is ten years old and attends a very prestigious private school in the southwest of England. He is tall for his age with jet black hair and grey eyes. Nathan can be described as slightly rotund and walks with a slight limp, having one leg shorter than the
other. He also wears glasses due to being shortsighted.
A clever and creative child who has problems sustaining this over prolonged periods resulting in him lagging behind his friends, this doesn't bother him though. Nathan enjoys his sport though wouldn't be called sporty. Due to his size he has excelled in the scrum of the school rugby team. At home he spends his time playing his dad's old SNES, he loves retro games.
He really lacks in self-confidence around strangers but is really close with his friends. His best friend is Snotty Fred who he has known since they were five; they also share the same birthday. In their spare time Nathan and his friends, Fred and twins
Ruben and Holly, spend their time making up adventures, obstacle courses using everyday items from the class room and talking video games. They are considered geeky outcasts by their class mates.
Ryan Phelps (9-12)
Ryan has just moved to Surcliffe in Dorset with his mother, who wanted Ryan to have a better life. Over the past year he has got into frequent fights with others at his school. He has no brothers or sisters and his dad left when he was just a baby. As a result he finds it hard to make friends and is content to be the silent one at the back of the class who gets on with his work.
He is very intelligent; he just doesn’t know where he wants to go in life. Ryan is mature and very independent, helping his mum around the house as much as he can. He is just starting his A-Levels in biology, history and media studies. Ryan has very curly brown hair and brown eyes and walks with his shoulders hunched in an attempt to be left alone; this also disguises his
surprising upper-body strength. Bullied at primary school, Ryan despises people who pick on others and has developed a short temper because of this. On his first day his new school he finds an unlikely friend in James, a Year 11 outcast.
Dialogue
"Peas... Again!" sighed Tom disgusted as he sat down at the lunch, "I hate peas. Sarah can I put them on your plate?"
"No you may not!" Sarah replied, rolling her eyes as she scooted onto the bench behind him, "my mum always says you must eat your greens."
Tom gathered up a spoonful of peas. "Your mum never told me nothing, here have some more," said Tom, tipping the peas over Sarah's plate.
"Tom! Stop it! Take them off, take them OFF!" squealed Sarah as she jumped up to aviod the overflowing peas on the table. Tom put a few peas on the palm of his hand and flicked them in Sarah's face, "Eat your greens Sarah. Eat your greens... they're good for you," mocked Tom, flicking more peas at her. Sarah burst into tears.
"Miss Evans! Tom's flicking his peas at me again!" sobbed Sarah.
Feedback:
Popular Children's Characters
You have summed up the characters well and hilighted the reasons children would relate to them. Don't forget to credit the authors with their work.
Your Own Characters
Cosmo - An appealing character who would suit the age group, although it will be a challenge writing sc-fi for children so young.
Nathan - A strong character
Ryan - If he's starting his A-levels he's too old. Children refer to read about others a little older than themselves, so he should be twelve, thirteen at the most. Make sure he has some flaws or weaknesses which make him more human, more interesting and provide characteristics which will determine how he reacts to the challenges he faces in the
story.
All characters have to be a little larger than life. They must have passions, fears and courage, Give them memorable features and
mannerisms and let them make an impact so the reader remembers them. Fix them in the mind by creating an anchor - a name, habit, way of speaking, a sensory perception.
Dialogue
A very god peice of natural dialogue with plenty of conflict, but it's not clear who the viewpoint character is as you have no thoughts. It's best to stick with one point of view (even 3rd person) and tell the story through the main character's eyes, at least in books for younger children. For older readers you can have more than one viewpoint character (third person multiple) but would still be 'inside' the head of that character and would only change between chapters.
You have woven plenty of action into the dialogue too, so that the reader has a mental image of what is happening and where. This helps break up the dialogue, anchors the speech in the scene and contributes to characterisation. It's not necessary to attribute all speech as long as it's clear who is speaking. Most attributive verbs are, and should be, invisible. They should not take the eye away from the speech. If you need to use one, said is usually the best. It is not noticed. The only time an attributive verb really pulls its weight when the meaning of the spoken words in't clear from speech, necessating, for example, 'she lied'.
Fictiona dialogue must have a point an a destination. It can never be general or polite conversation (or arguments). Dialogue is real life conversation without its sidetracks. It has two main functions: to move the story along and reveal character, which yours does very well.